HELP B/C MY HAIR IS HUGE!?

i have huge hair, about shoulder length that is curly and (because i was blessed with the curls, not the ones that actually look decent) and it frizzes out really bad. i go to a stylist who has the same hair type as me, she thins, she layers haha but it is a failure. i use shampoos and conditioners that "define curl" and aussie has been working decently... i resort to straightening it practically every day, which is obviously killing my hair... so in desperation to give up straightening and to love my hair, is their anyone who has some advice???!!!